I went on an interview in Arkansas where they said, "Wow, you must be intelligent to have graduated from _____ school." If only they knew how my trip ended...
I missed my connecting flight at 7:40pm in Dallas and unfortunately the only flight was the next morning at 8:40am. Now, airports aren't the most accommodating places for sleepovers, but someone tipped me off to a somewhat comfortable area where I could watch tv (luckily TBS was on, since I wasn't able to change the channel). I went there, alone, to watch tv and when I woke up about an hour later, I found a man watching me. Not quite the 'man of my dreams' I was looking for..
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A day of stupidity...not a rare occurrence, unfortunately.
1. I interviewed for a job the other day with the chief psychiatrist of the facility. I went to a clinical at one of the other offices for this facility yesterday and had a video conference with him and a few other sites. What idiotic, job-unsecuring thing did I do? I almost fell asleep. I'm on a big screen pinching myself, while my head bobs and my eyes cross. AND, I was wearing the same bright blue striped shirt as I did in the interview to make absolutely sure I stick out and he remembers me. I'm not going to hold my breath for that job... 2. I drew a blank in one of my patient's appointments and asked him what his weekend plans were. I think he thought I was asking him out... 3. While leaving this clinical, I drove West instead of East. It took me 25 minutes to realize I was farther away from home. AND, I had my GPS on. 4. Because it took me so long to get home, I had to reschedule a phone interview because I had terrible reception in the car. I'm also not going to hold my breath for that job. It's been one of those days. One of those days where more time is spent frolicking in La La Land than acknowledging reality. Just a few examples:
I literally spent 20 minutes brushing my teeth because I was multitasking. (For those of you who know I already take longer to brush, I'm usually done by 5 mins--10 tops.) I was daydreaming while driving and missed my exit. I wasn't paying attention when putting my laundry in the bottom of 2 stacked dryers..and turned on the top one. I didn't realize this, however, until I went to pick up my still wet clothes an hour later. Unfortunately, quarters are pretty hard to come by in my apt., so I had to dry all my clothes on my balcony. But it turned out kinda fun, because now all my clothes are as stiff as cardboard so I feel like one of those paper dolls I used to play with. In the middle of cooking dinner, I made myself something else to eat, forgetting I was already in the middle of cooking. I played in my sand volleyball league and daydreamed quite a few points away. It's amazing how quickly the whistle to serve the ball turns into just another background noise and how alarming it can be when you finally realize you're in the middle of a volley you don't remember starting. The worst part of all? I took my medication today. Walmart has earned itself quite a reputation for being accepting of all types of people. It is this special quality of Walmart's that makes it the only place I can go shopping in my bathing suit and not feel out of place or ashamed.
This happened during my first week of Grad School classes. The first time I met one of my teachers, she was walking around the room introducing herself to students before class started. For some reason, I voluntarily admitted, "I haven't done any of the readings for any of my classes yet. It's the first week and I'm already behind- whoops!"...and then I laughed..and also admitted that yes, I had all the books and I knew I had readings. Honesty may be the best policy, but sometimes I need to remind myself that it's not the only policy..
The day started and ended fearfully...
I went in to the gas station a few mornings ago to get some free coffee (a promo they have sadly ended). I was putting my 6 sugars in when a girl who worked there started talking to me. After a few minutes she pointed down to my leg. Why, you ask? Because there was a spider just about to disappear up my shorts! I very calmly screamed bloody murder and did an embarrassingly endearing little jig to get it off and spent the next few minutes gracefully twitching. That night, after a spectacularly boring day of class, a few friends and I went downtown to hear some music. Everything was going smoothly until the girl behind me dropped her menu. When I bent down to pick it up, she introduced herself, said that I was really cute, and groped me. I would have loved to have seen my face- was it appalled, frightened, shocked, or awkward? Who knows- all those feelings were there, I just don't know which one won over my facial muscles. What can I say? I'm a chick magnet. I was talking to a kid about pet peeves; when I said, "I hate wet pant legs", he responded very matter of factly, "Yeah, I don't like peeing my pants either." Perhaps I wasn't clear enough...
Have you ever jumped awake from a nightmare in the middle of class...on a day you're learning about narcolepsy? Em.bare.uh.sing. and eye.ron.ick.
I lose things all the time, so here's a tip: If you ever think, "I wouldn't be dumb enough to put it there", that should be the first place you look. That's how I found my car keys on a shelf in my closet.
Today I was running a little late to get to clinical and I didn't leave enough time to eat, so I hurried up and grabbed some food for the car. What did I grab? Clementines. Clementines for the car ride. I might as well have brought an uncut watermelon. Way to think ahead, Kate.
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